


Hidden Nature

by Nahiel



Series: Hidden Nature [1]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - BDSM, Angst, Dom/sub, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Pre-Slash, pre-lance/keith/shiro
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-30
Updated: 2017-09-30
Packaged: 2019-01-07 03:48:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12225144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nahiel/pseuds/Nahiel
Summary: Submissives aren't allowed to join the Garrison, and they definitely aren't allowed to be pilots.  Because of his dream to do just that, Lance has been successfully hiding what he is for years.  But the stress of becoming the Blue Paladin doesn't lend itself well to continuing to hide his submissive nature, and soon Lance is unable to keep his secret.Fortunately, Shiro and Keith are both doms, and should, theoretically, be able to help him through any drops.  Provided, of course, that Lance lets them.





	Hidden Nature

“Look, buddy, I don’t like putting my foot down, you know I don’t, but you’ve got to  _ tell _ them.”

 

Lance stared at Hunk, his eyes wide.  “No, no, I really don’t.  How can you say that?  I’m doing fine!”  He studiously ignored the way that he wanted nothing more than to drop to his knees in front of his very non-dynamic best friend, who would help him because he was awesome like that, but would get nothing out of doing it.

 

“Lance, my dude, you are shaking.”  Hunk held up one hand, a clear request for Lance to hold up one of his own.

 

It was the last thing that Lance wanted to do.  “I’m fine,” he said again, stubbornly.  “It’s just… it was a bad battle, that’s all.  I wasn’t expecting it to be so…” Frantic.  To wonder about the people he was killing in the enemy ships, even though they were trying to kill him.  

 

Everyone knew that subs weren’t cut out for combat flight, but Lance had thought he’d known better.  He’d thought he could prove everyone wrong, so he’d hidden what he was.  But…  it was starting to look like maybe those rules were in place for a reason, and now that he was operating without any kind of safety net, now that the universe was depending on him, Lance was finding that he maybe couldn’t do it after all.

 

He just didn’t want to admit it, because what good was he if he wasn’t the Blue Paladin anymore?  

 

And anyway, they’d successfully formed Voltron. and they’d won the battle, so that was something, right?

 

“Lance,” Hunk called, with the tone of one who’d been calling his name for a long time.

 

Lance came back to himself with a start.  He stared at Hunk through wide, startled eyes.  “I’m fine,” he said quickly.

 

He wasn’t fine, and he knew it.

 

“Come on,” Hunk said.  He wrapped an arm around Lance’s shoulders, heavy and implacable, and began to steer him in the general direction of the common area they all shared.  “We’re gonna go find Shiro.  Or Keith.”

 

And oh, God, the thought of Keith knowing that he was a sub, the smug look that was sure to be on his face…

 

Lance dug his heels in.  “No!”  He ducked out from under Hunk’s arm and spun away from him, taking a few rapid steps back.  “Hunk, I told you that in confidence, and if you betray me now—”

 

“What do you think you’re gonna do when you drop?” Hunk snapped.  It was rare that he was moved to true anger, but it seemed like he was there.

 

Lance flinched away from the words.  “I don’t—”  He stopped and took a deep breath.  “I’m not going to drop,” he said carefully.  Even though he knew he was showing signs of it, given the way he wanted to fall to his knees and beg Hunk for his forgiveness.  “Hunk, I’m fine.  I promise.  I’ll talk to… to Shiro, or someone, before it’s too late.”

 

Hunk’s eyes lit up, and Lance got a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach.  “Too late for what?” Shiro asked from behind him.

 

“Too late for nothing!” Lance squeaked.  He spun around, plastering his most okay smile onto his face.  “Everything’s fine!”

 

The expression he managed to pull off didn’t actually help, apparently.  “You don’t look so good,” Shiro said slowly, his brow furrowing.  “Lance, if there’s something that we need to know, I really think you should tell me.”

 

Lance swallowed.  “I’m great!”  He tried even harder to make his face do what he wanted it to do, to make himself smile the way he knew he could.  To make Shiro believe that everything was okay, because…  It all had to be okay.

 

Shiro’s hand landed on his shoulder, and it was entirely different than Hunk’s, because Hunk wasn’t a sub or a dom.  He was Hunk, and was neither.  Like Pidge.  He didn’t give off the same aura that Shiro did, that Keith did.  Both doms had something in them that made Lance want to go to his knees, to listen to whatever they said, to…

 

He almost hit the ground before he realized what he was doing.  Lance scrambled to correct himself, to regain his footing, but the damage was already done.  He could see it in the widening of Shiro’s eyes, the way that his lips shifted into a startled little ‘oh’ of realization.

 

Shiro knew, and God only knew what he was going to do about it.

 

Lance didn’t intend to find out.  He turned on his heel and fled, hoping that he could get away before Shiro could react.  He heard both Hunk and Shiro calling out for him as he fled, but he didn’t stop, didn’t turn to listen.  He just ran.

 

He’d kept it a secret since he’d realized, from everyone except for Hunk, and now, for the first time in his life, a dom knew his secret.

 

What the hell was he going to do?

 

ooOOooOOoo

 

Lance didn’t know how long he’d been hiding, or even where he was hiding.  He just knew that it was dark, dusty, and he was safe there.  Nobody could find him, and he could panic himself to pieces all on his own.  Which he was determined to do.

 

Anything was better than Shiro or Keith finding him, telling him…

 

But they would be kicking him out of the team.  He wasn’t stupid.  Clearly, he wasn’t handling this the way that he should be.  The way that doms were, or baselines, or even switches.  He was a sub, and as much as he hated to admit it, he really wasn’t cut out for combat flying.

 

What would he do if he wasn’t a Paladin anymore?  It wasn’t like he’d ever intended to be one, and he’d only been a part of the team for a few days, maybe a week or so, but… 

 

Lance let out a shuddering sob.  He didn’t want to think about it.  He wanted to wind back time, to go back a few hours, to just after the battle, to before he collapsed in the shower, before Hunk caught him crying, before Shiro overheard…

 

But that was all useless, wasn’t it?  There was no going back.  Nobody had ever developed a time machine, at least, not that Lance was aware of.

 

“Lance?”

 

Lance went still and tried to hold his breath.  Due to the fact that he was still sobbing, still letting out hitching cries quietly behind his hand, it didn’t really work.  Still, nobody could fault him for trying.

 

“Lance, there you are.”  The relief in Shiro’s voice hurt when he opened the door Lance was hiding behind and knelt down in front of him.  Shiro shouldn’t be on his knees.  That wasn’t a dom’s place.

 

And why was he kneeling, anyway?  Just where had Lance wedged himself that he had to kneel?  Was he… was he in a cupboard or something?

 

“Can you come out of there for me?” Shiro held out a hand to Lance, but made no move to jerk him out of the… well, it was probably a cupboard.

 

Lance swallowed and tried to stop his tears.  “I’m fine,” he said hoarsely.  “I’m good, Shiro.  You don’t have to worry about me or anything.  You can just go, and I’ll be okay.”

 

Shiro just stared at him, his eyebrows raised.  “You’re hiding in a cupboard, Lance, in a part of the castle that we haven’t even managed to gain access to yet.  Allura wasn’t even sure how you got in here; it should be sealed away.  She wasn’t even sure if there was life support in this part of the castle.”

 

Lance blinked, a bit distracted from his tears and the thoughts of gloom that were only getting worse the more he thought about it.  “There is,” he said.  He swallowed, trying to moisten his throat.  It worked, but not nearly as well as he’d hoped.  “Life support, in here.  There is.  I’m still alive.”

 

Shiro’s smile was soft, but there was an edge of worry to it still.  “I can see that,” he said.  He kept his hand extended, his left one, so that Lance wouldn’t have to grab onto his Galran arm.  “Can you please come out for me?”

 

Lance swallowed.  “You’re really worried,” he said.  It was a stupid thing to say.  Of course Shiro was worried; Lance had basically just fled from him after revealing…  well.  After Hunk tricked him into revealing his submissive status, and there was no way that Lance was ever going to forgive him for that, or at least, he wasn’t going to forgive him easily.

 

“Of course I am,” Shiro said.  He kept his voice soft and gentle.  “I’d very much appreciate it if you would come out and at least let me look you over, make sure you didn’t hurt yourself while you were wedging yourself in there.”

 

It was on the tip of Lance’s tongue to say no, to ask Shiro to leave him alone, but instead he just closed his eyes and turned his head away.  He was too tired to directly argue with the dom, no matter how much he wanted to.

 

“Lance, please don’t make me do this,” Shiro begged.  “I really need you to come out so that we can make sure that you’re okay.”

 

Who was we?  Was someone else there, someone that Lance hadn’t heard?  “Who else is out there?” he demanded.  He didn’t move.

 

“I am,” Keith called from somewhere off to one side.  “Lance, please, we’re both worried.  We’re not going to hurt you or anything, and I won’t lord this over your head or anything like that.  I promise.”

 

What a shock, that was the first thing Keith thought of.  It wasn’t really a surprise, given that Lance was almost positive that Keith would hold his identity against him.  It wasn’t like Lance thought it would be his fault or anything, because even Keith wasn’t that much of an asshole, it would just slip out sometime, and then Lance would get angry, and Keith would respond by getting angry, and the whole thing would be a disaster.

 

“I’m not moving,” Lance said stubbornly.

 

Shiro closed his eyes and exhaled sharply, and Lance ached at having put that exasperated expression on a dom’s face.  It was physically painful to see.  Then he opened his eyes, and there was a strange look to them, one that Lance couldn’t identify.  “Lance, come out of the cupboard, now,” Shiro said, his voice dark and dangerous.

 

His aura washed over Lance, and Lance found himself leaving the cupboard, scrambling to get out, because he was ordered to, because there was a dom telling him to and Lance was a good sub, not all the time, but he tried his hardest, and he didn’t want to make the dom angry…

 

“Not nice,” he gasped, once he was out in the open, kneeling in front of Shiro.  “Shiro, that wasn’t nice.”  He could be angry about that.  Doms who used their aura to force subs into doing things weren’t nice at all.  But… but he was pretty sure that Shiro was just doing it because Lance had been refusing to come out, and wasn’t that crappy of Lance?  He should listen to the dom, since he knew that Shiro only wanted what was best for him.

 

Shiro was awesome like that.

 

“I’m sorry,” Shiro murmured.  He touched Lance’s hair, his hand heavy but gentle.  “Lance, I’m so sorry, but I would do it again to get you out of that cupboard.” 

 

Lance found his eyes drifting closed, found his head tilting into Shiro’s touch.  It was so safe, so grounding…  He didn’t fight the way that his body wanted him to give in.  Shiro had started it, after all, giving him the order.

 

It had been so long since Lance had let himself go under, let himself give in to the allure of the soft, floaty feelings of subspace.

 

“Stand up.”  The voice wasn’t Shiro’s.  It was Keith’s.  It should have been enough to jerk Lance immediately from his mindset, but it… wasn’t, and wasn’t that terrifying?  What had he done to himself in those years of ignoring his urges so that he could actually be a fighter candidate?

 

Instead, Lance got smoothly to his feet, even though he had to lean against Shiro to do it.  He let himself be led from wherever he’d wound up, whatever part of the castle it was in, let himself be coaxed into the shower once more, because apparently he’d gotten himself all dusty.  He let himself be cleaned by Hunk, whose touch was gentle and impersonal, and let himself be led to the common area, where he was put on his knees between Shiro and Keith on a soft pillow.

 

His eyes drooped closed and he leaned to rest against Shiro’s knee, and let himself float away, and nobody said anything to force him back up.

 

ooOOooOOoo

 

When he came back to himself, his legs were asleep, the room was mostly dark, and Shiro and Keith were the only other two left.  They were having a quiet conversation, one that Lance almost wanted to listen in on, especially since it seemed to be about him, but he decided not to.

 

He cleared his throat and shifted away from Shiro.  His leg had to be sore, since Lance knew that he’d been leaning on it since he’d gone down.  And who knew how long that had been?  Shiro and Keith probably did, actually.  “How long was I under?” he asked.  He was surprised to find that his voice wasn’t hoarse, and realized that they must have given him water at some point.

 

“A few hours,” Keith said.  “How do you feel?”  

 

Lance didn’t know what he was expecting, but total neutrality from Keith wasn’t it.  “Better,” he said quietly.

 

“Do you think you’re more able to talk about it now?” Shiro asked.  He didn’t reach for Lance, and Lance was almost sad about that.

 

He’d liked being cosseted for those few hours, and what did that say about him?   _ It says you’re a sub, idiot _ , he thought, and then discarded the thought.  It wasn’t helpful.  “What’s there to talk about?” he asked instead.  He shifted onto his butt and drew his knees up to his chest, leaning back against the couch’s base.  He knew he should stand up, should sit in a chair to place himself on more even ground with the two doms, but…

 

Lance didn’t really feel up to that.

 

“How about we talk about why you didn’t tell us?” Keith asked.  There was belligerence in his voice, which was more welcome than the total neutrality of earlier.

 

Still, it felt abrasive, and Lance shivered away from it, flinching in Shiro’s general direction.  “Because there wasn’t anything to be done about it once we were out here, and now you guys are going to need to find a new Blue Paladin, and I—”

 

“Who said we were going to need that?” Shiro interrupted.

 

Lance froze, but his heart started pounding.  “You’re not kicking me off the team?” he asked, unable to keep the surprise, the hope from his voice.

 

“It’s not like we have a ton of choices,” Keith muttered.

 

“And even if we did,” Shiro said loudly, like he could override what Keith had just said with his voice alone, “Even if we did, you’ve done a wonderful job so far, Lance.”

 

Lance drew in a shuddering breath.  “But I might drop again,” he whispered.  Because he knew that’s what happened, in spite of the fact that it never had before.  The stress had been too much, and he’d shut down, and he’d worried the whole team, and—

 

“And that’s something we’ll need to address,” Shiro said calmly.  He reached out and touched Lance’s hair again, as gentle as he had the first time.  “But it’s not something that I’m prepared to throw you off the team for.  This is something that we can manage, Lance.”

 

It almost sounded like a terminal illness when Shiro put it like that, and Lance couldn’t help the small, slightly hysterical laugh that escaped him.  “You really think so?” he asked.

 

“Of course,” Shiro said.  “Now that Keith and I know, you can come to us whenever you need to.  It might not be as good as having a proper dom of your own, but Keith and I will take care of you, will put you under if you need us to.  There’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”

 

Lance swallowed and drew his knees even closer to himself.  It sounded… almost too good to be true.  It sounded dangerous was what it sounded like, because Lance had always looked up to Shiro, and if he was being honest with himself, something he tried to do most of the time, he’d always sort of admired Keith as well.

 

This arrangement, going to one of them when he needed to be put under, it sounded like a really good way to get stuck in a bad situation.  Like one where he had feelings, but the two doms didn’t.

 

And yet, what other options did he have?

 

“Yeah,” he said slowly.  He swallowed and tried to make himself sound more certain.  “Yeah, okay, this could work.”

 

Maybe it wasn’t ideal, but it was better than being thrown off the team.  Lance would do just about anything to avoid that, even potentially get his heart broken.  Not that he thought it would come to that.  He was fine.  He could totally do this.

 

All he had to do was ignore any inconvenient feelings.  And that… that was easy, right?


End file.
